People assume it’s the hard wood of a church pew that makes it so uncomfortable for long periods.
But a woman who’s had to listen to a sermon about love and kindness and humility and doing for others and forgiveness, etc., etc., while sitting next to her abuser knows that’s not true.
Focusing on the pastor’s words while trying not to remember last night’s attack is uncomfortable.
Smiling while your abuser tells a lighthearted joke after the service, because he doesn’t see or care that you’re hurting, is uncomfortable.
Hearing him offer to help fellow congregant Joe Schmo build a new deck tomorrow when he has refused to fix your own kitchen drawer for months is uncomfortable.
Watching him lovingly tease the Sunday school teacher’s toddler when he ignores his own children at home is uncomfortable.
And so on and so forth, amen.
Spirituality ebbs and flows, seizes and grows, and will look + feel different during and after the healing process. Be patient. Be open. Guide your own spirituality… or not. It’s up to you to define now.
Maybe for you, Sunday is a quiet day in nature, or a fun day with friends. Maybe it’s finding a new church that functions differently from your last.
It’s up to you, your body, and your spirit.