Tag: domestic abuse

The Proof (and Magic) of Milestones

Proof. My son’s cap and gown for high school graduation came in this week. In May he’ll don the duo, walk alongside his classmates and best friends, and together — with his older sister, now a sophomore in college — we’ll mark one of… Continue Reading “The Proof (and Magic) of Milestones”

In My (post-abuse & abuse-free) Home

We: create peace favor warmth, and that which is authentic value security make a concerted effort to know and love ourselves share pride in each other stand for what’s right, and defend ourselves celebrate small victories support each other think critically own our responsibilities… Continue Reading “In My (post-abuse & abuse-free) Home”

A Promise for Me and You

Just promise you won’t forget how amazing you are. When it feels like no one is in your corner, that no one is rallying, no one is standing by to throw you a life raft. It’s just you and your tried-and-true sink-or-swim determination. You… Continue Reading “A Promise for Me and You”

Why a Life of Second-Guessing?

What if the reason you’ve spent a lifetime unsure, driven by self-doubt, and habitually second-guessing yourself is that someone(s) who held the most power for impact and effect during your formation (by which I mean formative years, yes, but also beyond: the sum total)… Continue Reading “Why a Life of Second-Guessing?”

Think Like a Monk (and hurl fewer FU’s)

I have a habit of wishing those who upset me a hearty “F*ck you” in my head. And while I will always insist that anger has a healthy place in our healing, that we should both respect and allow it, I can also acknowledge… Continue Reading “Think Like a Monk (and hurl fewer FU’s)”

It’s Time to Get Comfortable with Yourself

Take the selfie. Save the selfie. Share the selfie. Serious and silly. You don’t have to listen to the noise about how our world is “selfie-obsessed” and “self-absorbed.” If you’ve spent any time at all questioning your appearance, hating your body, or harboring low… Continue Reading “It’s Time to Get Comfortable with Yourself”

Life is Cyclical

One day you’re a newly divorced single mom living in a crappy low-income apartment with no washer/dryer hookups, schlepping as infrequently as possible to the local laundromat to clean everything, in big loads, for your family of three. It’s an awful, detestable chore you… Continue Reading “Life is Cyclical”

Why Perspective May Not Do You Any Favors

Perspective. It’s important. A friend shared with me the other day that by seeing what someone else was going through in their home, she considered for herself, “Maybe it’s not so bad for me.” I agree with her. When we have tunnel vision our… Continue Reading “Why Perspective May Not Do You Any Favors”

How Public Housing Perpetuates a Pattern of Control

“Such narrow, domineering rules feel a lot like the way domestic abuse feels.” This essay has been knocking around my noggin for months. Today I blew the dust off my Medium account and hit “publish.” I hope you’ll take a chance to check it… Continue Reading “How Public Housing Perpetuates a Pattern of Control”

No, Not Everyone is Toxic

I don’t know about you, but I’m seeing lots of content that wants the world’s toxicity shared equally among its residents. Example: “You can’t really begin to grow until you accept that you were toxic, too.” Bullshit. I do not accept this victim-blaming. Do… Continue Reading “No, Not Everyone is Toxic”