Tag: domestic abuse
Posted on May 17, 2022
by Janna
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My sweet dad took his last breath on this day twelve years ago. I was in the room when it happened. In fact, I was the one who realized he wasn’t breathing anymore. Hospice warns you, you know. They’ve gotten really good at estimating… Continue Reading “Death: Why My Life Started Over”
Category: Abuse Against Women, Advice, Advocacy & Education, Living Your Own Life, Opinion, Personal Essay, Self Empowerment, Self ImprovementTags: abuse survivors, catalyst, death, death of a loved one, domestic abuse, Domestic Violence, emotional abuse, gaslighting, grief, healing, manipulation, narcissistic abuse, reflection, starting over after abuse, survivor, waking up
Posted on May 14, 2022
by Janna
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A reframe Sometimes, to victims learning how to survive, it feels like life is stuck “in the trenches.” We use the idiom when we’re feeling beaten down, challenged, heartbroken, threatened, damaged. When we’ve forgotten our hope. Merriam-Webster defines the phrase as “a place or… Continue Reading “Life in the Trenches”
Category: Abuse Against Women, Advice, Advocacy & Education, Living Your Own Life, Opinion, Personal Essay, Self Empowerment, Self ImprovementTags: abuse survivors, domestic abuse, DV, emotional abuse, gaslighting, healing, idioms, life in the trenches, manipulation, narcissistic abuse, protection, self-protection, starting over after abuse, strategy, survivor, trenches, victory
Posted on May 13, 2022
by Janna
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Do you want to talk about financial abuse? Because we should. Financial abuse is a component of domestic abuse 99% of the time. (Source: National Network to End Domestic Violence) It happens when your abuser hides money, spends freely on their wants and needs… Continue Reading “Financial & Post-Separation Abuse”
Category: Abuse Against Women, Advice, Advocacy & Education, Living Your Own Life, Opinion, Personal Essay, Self Empowerment, Self ImprovementTags: abuse survivors, debt, discard, domestic abuse, DV, emotional abuse, financial abuse, fraud, gaslighting, healing, manipulation, narcissistic abuse, post-separation abuse, starting over after abuse, stealing, survivor
Posted on May 7, 2022
by Janna
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Okay, so your abuser had a traumatic childhood. Something life-changing, perhaps horrifying, happened to them. The stuff nightmares are made of. It was out of their control. Or maybe they were, for example, raised by a detached, materialistic father and callous, dismissive mother, so… Continue Reading “Your Abuser’s Trauma is No Excuse”
Category: Abuse Against Women, Advice, Advocacy & Education, Living Your Own Life, Opinion, Personal Essay, Self Empowerment, Self ImprovementTags: abuse survivors, childhood trauma, control, coping techniques, domestic abuse, Domestic Violence, emotional abuse, gaslighting, healing, manipulation, narcissistic abuse, starting over after abuse, survivor, therapy, trauma
Posted on May 4, 2022
by Janna
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I used to belong to a conservative Christian church. I wasn’t raised in it, or in any church. In fact I was always thankful my parents never forced religion on me. That opened me to visiting different, diverse denominations with my friends over the… Continue Reading “Politics and Religion and Abuse Toward Women”
Category: Abuse Against Women, Advocacy & Education, Living Your Own Life, Opinion, Personal Essay, Self Empowerment, Self ImprovementTags: abuse, Christianity, church, conservative, domestic abuse, enabling, healthcare, misogyny, patriarchy, religion, reproductive rights, republican, sexism, women's rights
Posted on April 27, 2022
by Janna
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Because your abuser never did Things your abuser should have said to you, and meant with every fiber, include: * You’re beautiful. * Thank you for everything you do. * How can I help you today? * You’re talented. * I love your eyes/hair/caboose/brain/fashion… Continue Reading “What to Say to Yourself”
Category: Abuse Against Women, Advice, Advocacy & Education, Living Your Own Life, Opinion, Personal Essay, Self Empowerment, Self ImprovementTags: abuse survivors, domestic abuse, emotional abuse, gaslighting, healing, manipulation, narcissistic abuse, neglect, starting over after abuse, survivor
Posted on April 10, 2022
by Janna
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Maybe you need to hear it’s okay to be single. The conditioning that forced us into codependency makes us think differently, at least at first. And the emotional neglect, the deficit in love and respect we carry after abuse, makes us needy. We want… Continue Reading “It’s Okay to Be Single, Survivor”
Category: Abuse Against Women, Advice, Advocacy & Education, Living Your Own Life, Opinion, Personal Essay, Self Empowerment, Self ImprovementTags: abuse survivors, dating, dating after domestic abuse, domestic abuse, emotional abuse, healing, narcissistic abuse, self-acceptance, self-love, self-respect, starting over after abuse, survivor, validation
Posted on April 8, 2022
by Janna
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Step 1: Listen to that tiny voice when it says you deserve better. Step 2: Internalize that you need to leave. Step 3: Figure out a way to leave, then leave. Or leave even without a clear plan. Whatever it takes, hopefully with a… Continue Reading “How to Deal with Abuse”
Category: Abuse Against Women, Advice, Advocacy & Education, Living Your Own Life, Opinion, Personal Essay, Self Empowerment, Self ImprovementTags: abuse, domestic abuse, DV, education, empowerment, healing, starting over after abuse, survivor
Posted on April 6, 2022
by Janna
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Those who have never experienced an abusive relationship assume that at the inception of one they would take charge and respond with empowerment immediately. “I would NEVER allow that.” But a domestic abuse truth is that its victims are groomed and conditioned from the… Continue Reading “A Note for Survivor Supporters”
Category: Abuse Against Women, Advice, Advocacy & Education, Living Your Own Life, Opinion, Personal Essay, Self Empowerment, Self ImprovementTags: conditioning, control, domestic abuse, DV, education, empowerment, healing, physical violence
Posted on April 3, 2022
by Janna
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Three simple words. Many people blow right by them; the phrase doesn’t even register. Those are the people who have never questioned their worth. They don’t carry a deficit in validation. They weren’t devalued, over and over again, by someone who was supposed to… Continue Reading “You Are Enough”
Category: Abuse Against Women, Advice, Advocacy & Education, Living Your Own Life, Opinion, Personal Essay, Self Empowerment, Self ImprovementTags: abuse survivors, domestic abuse, Domestic Violence, emotional abuse, gaslighting, healing, manipulation, narcissistic abuse, self-love, self-worth, starting over after abuse, survivor, validation