Tag: emotional abuse

The Proof (and Magic) of Milestones

Proof. My son’s cap and gown for high school graduation came in this week. In May he’ll don the duo, walk alongside his classmates and best friends, and together — with his older sister, now a sophomore in college — we’ll mark one of… Continue Reading “The Proof (and Magic) of Milestones”

In My (post-abuse & abuse-free) Home

We: create peace favor warmth, and that which is authentic value security make a concerted effort to know and love ourselves share pride in each other stand for what’s right, and defend ourselves celebrate small victories support each other think critically own our responsibilities… Continue Reading “In My (post-abuse & abuse-free) Home”

A Promise for Me and You

Just promise you won’t forget how amazing you are. When it feels like no one is in your corner, that no one is rallying, no one is standing by to throw you a life raft. It’s just you and your tried-and-true sink-or-swim determination. You… Continue Reading “A Promise for Me and You”

Why a Life of Second-Guessing?

What if the reason you’ve spent a lifetime unsure, driven by self-doubt, and habitually second-guessing yourself is that someone(s) who held the most power for impact and effect during your formation (by which I mean formative years, yes, but also beyond: the sum total)… Continue Reading “Why a Life of Second-Guessing?”

It’s Time to Get Comfortable with Yourself

Take the selfie. Save the selfie. Share the selfie. Serious and silly. You don’t have to listen to the noise about how our world is “selfie-obsessed” and “self-absorbed.” If you’ve spent any time at all questioning your appearance, hating your body, or harboring low… Continue Reading “It’s Time to Get Comfortable with Yourself”

Why Perspective May Not Do You Any Favors

Perspective. It’s important. A friend shared with me the other day that by seeing what someone else was going through in their home, she considered for herself, “Maybe it’s not so bad for me.” I agree with her. When we have tunnel vision our… Continue Reading “Why Perspective May Not Do You Any Favors”

How Public Housing Perpetuates a Pattern of Control

“Such narrow, domineering rules feel a lot like the way domestic abuse feels.” This essay has been knocking around my noggin for months. Today I blew the dust off my Medium account and hit “publish.” I hope you’ll take a chance to check it… Continue Reading “How Public Housing Perpetuates a Pattern of Control”

What You Sacrifice to Find Yourself

You’ll lose people along your journey. Sometimes it’s because they enable the one who abused you, therefore you cannot maintain connection with them. Sometimes it’s because they believe the lies and rumors, the smear campaign about you, and forsake their connection to you. Sometimes… Continue Reading “What You Sacrifice to Find Yourself”

Triggers in the Wild

It happened again last night. I saw someone from Our Story out of context. We were at a community event, both my kids and me. A man passed by and he looked familiar. Something about the dark hair and glasses. My eyes kept wandering… Continue Reading “Triggers in the Wild”

How to Get Help and Leave Abuse

I know it’s hard to ask for help, especially once you’ve internalized you need to leave and it’s time to make a plan. Here’s how I help women (in America) find resources that are local to them. Save this in case you ever need… Continue Reading “How to Get Help and Leave Abuse”