Category: Advice

Karma & Consequence

Their world is slowly but definitely imploding, you can trust me on that. You may not witness the fall today or tomorrow, but it’s going to happen. Because when you build your life around hurting othersmanipulating the truthstealing money &ruining your creditburning bridgesbreaking the… Continue Reading “Karma & Consequence”

Dating After Domestic Abuse: Stay Single for as Long as You Were Abused

An unpopular opinion. I think we should be single for as long as we were in the abusive relationship. Will this always be the ruler by which to measure our healing and health and readiness? No, definitely not. Because a short-term abusive relationship (half… Continue Reading “Dating After Domestic Abuse: Stay Single for as Long as You Were Abused”

Post-Separation Abuse Often Includes Neglect of the Kids

I didn’t know about the cookies. Back then I knew about the unbrushed teeth and hair. Limited bathing. He had them looking like ragamuffins. I knew about how the electric company had shut off power because of nonpayment. I knew about the house approaching… Continue Reading “Post-Separation Abuse Often Includes Neglect of the Kids”

Why Volunteerism is a Powerful Healing Tool

Do you volunteer? Because I’d like to make the case for adding volunteerism to your arsenal of healing weapons. And here’s why. You make new friends.You gain new skills.You create a difference.You expand your passions. And most important, I think, is that you begin… Continue Reading “Why Volunteerism is a Powerful Healing Tool”

The Proof (and Magic) of Milestones

Proof. My son’s cap and gown for high school graduation came in this week. In May he’ll don the duo, walk alongside his classmates and best friends, and together — with his older sister, now a sophomore in college — we’ll mark one of… Continue Reading “The Proof (and Magic) of Milestones”

Because of Your Sensibilities

Some people will treat you as if your sensibilities are a vulnerability, a habitual liability, because then it’s easier for them to begrudge and ignore your strengths. You can’t please them. You also don’t have meet their skewed and unrealistic expectations. Just do you,… Continue Reading “Because of Your Sensibilities”

In My (post-abuse & abuse-free) Home

We: create peace favor warmth, and that which is authentic value security make a concerted effort to know and love ourselves share pride in each other stand for what’s right, and defend ourselves celebrate small victories support each other think critically own our responsibilities… Continue Reading “In My (post-abuse & abuse-free) Home”

A Promise for Me and You

Just promise you won’t forget how amazing you are. When it feels like no one is in your corner, that no one is rallying, no one is standing by to throw you a life raft. It’s just you and your tried-and-true sink-or-swim determination. You… Continue Reading “A Promise for Me and You”

Why a Life of Second-Guessing?

What if the reason you’ve spent a lifetime unsure, driven by self-doubt, and habitually second-guessing yourself is that someone(s) who held the most power for impact and effect during your formation (by which I mean formative years, yes, but also beyond: the sum total)… Continue Reading “Why a Life of Second-Guessing?”

Think Like a Monk (and hurl fewer FU’s)

I have a habit of wishing those who upset me a hearty “F*ck you” in my head. And while I will always insist that anger has a healthy place in our healing, that we should both respect and allow it, I can also acknowledge… Continue Reading “Think Like a Monk (and hurl fewer FU’s)”