Why Perspective May Not Do You Any Favors

Perspective.

It’s important.

A friend shared with me the other day that by seeing what someone else was going through in their home, she considered for herself, “Maybe it’s not so bad for me.”

I agree with her. When we have tunnel vision our world can feel, look, present worse than it is. A fresh dose of someone else’s reality can open us to the periphery, a broader outlook, and ground us in context.

“So-and-so is fighting cancer. My problem, this thing at home, isn’t nearly so grave.”

Well sure.

But I also feel very strongly that that’s always not the end of it.

Suffering is relative, and comparison isn’t always helpful.

Because when it comes to the abuse, how often do we justify their behavior?

Minimize the why and how — plus the result — of their attack?

Look the other way?

Pretend we aren’t hurting?

Shoulder all the blame?

Convince ourselves we’re overreacting?

Why do we assume it “could be worse,”

without spinning that on its axis and asking,

“But could it be better?”

“Why don’t I deserve better?”