UNITY FOLLOWING ABUSE IS NOT POSSIBLE | When a woman leaves her abusive partner — that is, truly leaves after however many prior attempts, and has finally made it clear she will not return to the relationship — he will try, with his arsenal of tactics, to shift what was labeled “romantic” into a friendship. This serves at least two purposes if he is successful. One is that it allows him to maintain infiltration in her life so that his power and control will continue, even if it looks different. Two is that if he can create any sense of unity or lasting connection between them, his narrative that he’s a good guy, never did anything wrong, has a platform.
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